How God Worked in My Journey of Faith

When God remembers someone, God is ready to act on someone’s welfare. He does not forget. He is at work.

I remember the fear when I published and released my first book. Dropping it off at my store, I quickly wanted to return and take back my books. The trepidation and doubt I faced were overwhelming, but I didn’t run back to the store. Instead, I asked for support from a few close friends, drove home, and prayed. I knew God was calling me to share my book with the world, but at that moment, I wasn’t sure how everything would play out. God was at work.

REGARDLESS, GOD WORKED

God often does not let us know how obeying Him will play out. In Genesis 6:18, God says to Noah, “But I will establish my covenant with you, and you will enter the ark with your sons, your wife, and sons’ wives.” Noah understood what a covenant (a promise) was but in the history of the world an ark had never been built. Regardless, Noah built the ark. It was 1 ½ football fields long and the width of a six-lane interstate. This was no small boat. The neighbors thought he was crazy, but God was at work.

GOD IS READY TO ACT

No way did Noah initially understand how his obedience would play out or how long he would be on the ark. Later in Genesis 8:1, God “remembered Noah.” Scholars believe Noah and his family lived on the ark for 370 days amid an earth completely covered with water. In the Bible, when God remembers someone, it indicates that God is ready to act on someone’s welfare. God does not forget. He is at work.

WAYS WE CANNOT IMAGINE

God showed up for Noah before the ark was built, during the process, and afterward. Often, we do not know how our obedience will play out or how we will build our own “arks”. Sometimes we doubt God’s orders. He may call us to build our arks or serve in a way that colors way outside of the lines. God works in ways we cannot imagine.

I’m glad I drove home that day, leaving my books at my store, I followed through with building the ark God called me to. As of writing this, my book has sold multiple copies. The messages and comments I received were wonderful. This is all and only from God.

When you build the ark God asks you to, He will see you through. What He did for Noah, what He did for me, He can do for you. Let God work.

Check out Ashley’s website: https://brokenuntilnow.com/

Emmanuel: God’s Promise to Exiled Humanity

The highway leading to eternal separation from God now offers an off-ramp leading to eternal community

Read: Colossians 1:21-22

Did you realize everyone who walks on Planet Earth is an exile, someone barred from one’s native country? Adam and Eve’s native country was the Garden of Eden. Daily, they walked and delighted in the presence of God. However, they were barred from their birthplace when they sinned. Sin brought both separation from God and death.  Because sin cannot in anyway exist in the presence of God, all mankind became “separated from Him by our evil thoughts and actions”. Thanks to Adam and Eve, all mankind is naturally born exiled from the very presence of God.

THE ETERNAL GOD REACHED OUT

This broke God’s heart. The original Latin text for the hymn “O Come O Come Emmanuel” contains a reverse acrostic. It translates: “I shall be with you tomorrow”. The Eternal God reaches out to exiled humanity. He promised us His presence. That’s why God gave His Son the name Emmanuel which literally means “God with us”.

Written around the 8th century, this hymn was meant to be sung antiphonally. This entailed alternate singing by two choirs, positioned on opposite sides of a sanctuary. The first choir would sing “O come, O come, Emmanuel” While the sound waves still resonated across the expanse, the 2nd choir began singing “And ransom captive Israel”. And so, they alternately sing line after line, ever growing in confident hope. The building reverberates with the glorious sounds. Heaven rejoices as God reaches out to exiled humanity.

THE SON OF GOD APPEARS

All the angelic hosts break loose singing “the Son of God appears! Rejoice! Rejoice!” Heaven resounds with exuberant jubilant song. This is not the half-hearted clapping for someone receiving a participation award. This is the full throttle choirs of the heavens stamping their feet because God has won! The highway leading to eternal separation from God now offers an off-ramp leading to eternal community, companionship, and peace with God. The exiles no longer must face separation from God.

GOD IS WITH US! DRAW NEAR!

For all of you longing, hungering for God, His promise has been fulfilled. O Lord, make safe the way that leads to Thee and close the path to misery. God is with us! Draw near!

We face a new year. Challenges and heartbreak which you never anticipated may try to tear apart your life in shockwaves of pain. However, whatever comes, God also invites you to unimaginable victory. God invites the exile home. He desires to spend every moment with us.  Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault.”

RUN TO THE FATHER

Run to the Father. He offers you His eternal presence. Regardless of what 2026 brings, no longer do you have to remain in exile. Come home!

O come, O come, Emmanuel and ransom captive Israel. That mourns in lonely exile here until the Son of God appears. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel shall come to thee, oh Israel

O come, Thou Key of David, come and open wide our heavenly home. Make safe the way that leads to thee and close the path to misery. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel shall come to thee, oh Israel

Creating a Wish List for Jesus This Christmas

Our family likes to use an app to create our own personalized wish list so we can shop for each other. Giving someone what they really want guarantees to bring a smile, right? One year while shopping, I looked down at my gift giving list: our parents, the kids, grandparents, and friends. I realized Jesus’ name was not on the list. It’s His birthday, but where was His name?

NOT ON THE LIST

For the past 35 Christmases our family has gathered around a decorated birthday cake for Jesus. We sing “Happy Birthday” to Him.  How did I have miss including Jesus’s name on my gift list for so many years? Since Christmas is Jesus’ world-wide birthday party, giving Him a gift should be a no-brainer for me.   I cannot simply send Jesus an invite to join our family wish-list on the app, I began asking Him what He would like from me for His birthday. 

WHAT IS ON HIS LIST?

I prayed, “Lord, what is on your wish-list?  What meaningful gift can I possibly give You, the Creator of everything known to man? Oh, yeah, You have asked me to give You my eating habits. My daily quiet time with You could use some specific improvements. There is that attitude or habit I have that is not exactly Christ-like. Words that come out of my mouth could use Your touch.  I say I trust you, but then I allow myself to worry. And what about my tithing?” 

There are many things to choose from on His wish list.

Search me [thoroughly], O God, and know my heart; Test me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there is any wicked or hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way (Psalm 139:23-24).

ASK HIM FOR HIS LIST

The wish-list Jesus has for each of us is different. What is He working on (or wishes to) transform in your life? After giving it some thought and prayer, consider getting out a piece of paper and envelope and writing a letter to Jesus. Tell Him what your gift(s) to Him this year.  Put it under the tree for Him and only Him. This action guarantees to make Him smile. Happy birthday Jesus!

Holy Spirit, guide us each as we look for parts of ourselves, we can give (surrender) to You this Christmas. We do not need to be afraid to ask. Your conviction is gentle, full of grace, mercy and love. Transform and purify us You shape us to look more and more like Your Son, Jesus. Amen.

Finding Hope in the Hospital: A Personal Journey

This was not a good day at the hospital. Where was hope?

This was not a good day at the hospital. Where was hope? The doctors are not happy with the amount of fluid the kidneys refuse to expel; the physician again adjusted the meds. Bill’s blood pressure began to climb. To top it off, the other doctor was not happy regarding the occasional dips in oxygen. Didn’t God know what was going on?

CANCELLED HOMECOMING

This was the day Bill had a 50/50 chance of finally coming home from the hospital. That chance flew out the window. Our hopes plummeted. I was barely able to put one foot in front of the other. Didn’t God hear me?

DOESN’T GOD WATCH OUT FOR ME?

My emotional state was fragile. And then came the text. An acquaintance told me in no uncertain terms what demands I must make of the hospital. This text was not a suggestion; it was in command form. I need another command like a hole in my head right now. Doesn’t God watch out for me?

Earlier I had prayed for just some glimpse of Him on a very dark day.

GOD SHOWS UP IN THE PRODUCE AISLE

But in then the middle of this mess, God shows us up!!!! I stopped at the grocery store on the way home.  There’s a young man who works there who is both friendly and goofy. The guy is a big man, and I look like a midget beside him. He passed by me in the produce aisle, paused and turned around. Then he asked, “How are you doing Honey?” (No disrespect, he always calls me that) 

I barely kept back the tears as I told him this wasn’t a good day. He asked what happened. After carefully listening, he gave me not only one, but two bear hugs. He told me he’s praying for me.

GOD HEARS EVEN IN THE DARK

God heard me all the while today and sent a young man as an angel in the produce aisle. In the midst of all of this, God is very much present. I only can see right in front of me, but God sees the miles yet to go. God hears even in the dark. What a blessing when random people feel the nudges of God and obey! God shows up.

Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? (Matthew 6:26-27)

GOD SHOWS UP

All those tears I have tried to keep in check since the first hospitalization on November 25th ran down my face. God heard.

Since November 25th our days have been filled with ER visits, hospitalizations, doctor appointments, and a confusing array of conflicting opinions from specialists. We are exhausted, down to our last array of strength, and God keeps showing up often when we least expect it.

ANGELS FROM GOD

“Angel” means messenger from God. God apparently has an abundance of them in human form. Two days ago, I was exceptionally brittle and down to my last ounce of courage. As I trucked in to yet again keep vigil at the hospital a song played. It mentioned tears at Christmas. At that point I lost it. I literally howled in the car. All those tears I have tried to keep in check since the first hospitalization on November 25th ran down my face. God heard.

LOVED, SNOT AND ALL

God showed up. That afternoon one friend stopped by unannounced. She lost her husband several years ago and understands the emotional and spiritual warfare at play. She didn’t tell me to buck up or shower me with Christian truisms. Instead, she hugged me, loved me, spoke Scripture over me and prayed for me. Within the hour another Christian sister also visited; let me cry, snot and all. God showed up through these angels.

None of these sisters belong to a Christian committee or are paid to visit. They just listen to God and turn up.

ROCK BOTTOM

The next day, Bill hit bottom both physically and emotionally. The doctor told him that his blood numbers are finally beginning to start to look better. The next words were “You will be here until at least the weekend.” Not the words Bill wanted to hear, especially since he was experiencing unrelenting backpain. Bill had just been transferred out of the ICU to a new floor in the hospital. They were understaffed. Official medical help was a long time a coming.

BROTHER D

Out of the blue, in walked Brother D. He didn’t have a set agenda. God delivered our messenger of encouragement. Brother D did it beautifully. He listened to God’s nudge and obeyed.

DRIVE BY MESSENGERS

Then arrived our friends from another country. I call them “God’s Drive by Messengers”. Due to their experience caring for their invalid father for a number of years, they gave Bill the best foot massage he ever received. Then together as a team they repositioned him on his bed, so Bill’s back was more at ease. Nudged by God, they showed up and unconventionally obeyed.

HEARING THE NUDGE AND SHOWING UP

And that is the role of genuine believers – they listen to God and show up. It might not be something in their comfort level, and it may not fit in their schedule.

Thanks to all of you who have sent messages, called and dropped by. Kudos to you who have ardently kept us in your prayers. Since November 25th, twice without the intervention of God we would have lost Bill. Heaven will be blessed by Bill’s presence but there are still so many more lives Bill wants to reach for Christ.

GOD SMILES

Dear Messengers, the world is not aware of your service, but Heaven is listening to your obedience to Christ. You have felt God’s nudge and showed up. God smiles.

I HEARD THE BELLS ON CHRISTMAS DAY

Christmas Day 1862 Henry wrote in his journal “A merry Christmas” say the children, but that is no more for me.”

American poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote these lyrics during a dark season. Two years previously his wife had been sealing envelopes with hot wax when the flame caught her clothes on fire.  Henry, burned badly as well, was too sick to attend her funeral.  For the remainder of his life, he covered up his facial scars behind a long beard. Christmas Day 1862 Henry wrote in his journal “A merry Christmas” say the children, but that is no more for me.”

NO PEACE ON EARTH

By 1863 the country tore itself apart in Civil War.  Against Henry’s wishes (and fears) his son, Charles, enlisted in the army. No wonder Henry wrote: And in despair I bowed my head, ‘There is no peace on earth,’ I said, for hate is strong and mocks the song of peace on earth, good will to men. In November, a bullet pierced Charles from back to shoulder, just nicking his spine. Henry traveled to Washington to retrieve his son from the hospital.  Arriving at home December 8th, Charles began his extended convalescence.  This was grief at its deepest. 

God loved Henry in the midst. His love had not run out.

GOD IS NOT DEATH NOR DOTH HE SLEEP!

Slowly, Henry’s heart began to heal and turn back to God.  Along with everything else, he experienced a dry season in writing.  But then, sitting at his desk one morning he heard the church bells.  Henry’s heart began to resonate with the return of hope.  Hope for his son, hope for his family and hope for a nation torn apart by war.  God began to wake his heart when he wrote: “Then pealed the bells more loud and deep: God is not dead; nor doth he sleep! The wrong shall fail, the right prevail. With peace on earth, good-will to men!” God had not departed.

THE BELLS PEAL FOR ETERNITY

The sinless One, Jesus Christ, came to bring hope: complete reconciliation between mankind and God.  Because of this, Longfellow journaled: “I thought how as the day had come; the belfries of all Christendom had rolled along the unbroken song of peace on earth, good will to men.   That’s why the bells peal for all eternity.”  Will the bells peal for all eternity signaling that you have made peace with God via Jesus Christ?  Even when grief is at its deepest, God has not departed. The season of darkness can pass.  

Click to read more on discovering lasting peace.

JOY MEANT FOR ALL

Emotionally, I can feel like a ping pong ball thwacked back and forth by the paddles of life.

As I drove to work, a few bars of “Joy to the World” began to play on the radio. As its upbeat arrangement attempted to rouse a jolly response, I couldn’t help but admit I wasn’t feeling particularly festive. Christmas is called “the most wonderful time of the year”….But, not for all.

THE PING PONG BALL EFFECT

Sometimes I love the season and revel in the trimmings, twinkling lights, and tunes. Then there are the times I white-knuckle my way through landmines of longing, loss, and loneliness intensified by the holiday season. Emotionally, I can feel like a ping pong ball thwacked back and forth by the paddles of life.

THWACKED BACK AND FORTH BY LIFE

Picture that very first Christmas. Did Mary and Joseph also feel like ping pong balls bounced back and forth by unseen or unknown powers? Not yet married and expecting a baby, Mary and Joseph lived with the aftermath of losing their reputations and highly likely relationships with friends and family. They experienced the loneliness of not belonging anywhere. Did they feel thwacked back and forth by life in a world lost and longing for the Savior?

BOTH HARDSHIP AND BEAUTY

The “trimmings” of that first Christmas were rough. Judean stables often were not made of wood like we see portrayed. More likely it was a damp cave or lower-level annex hewn out of rock. Jesus made his grand entrance not as a magnificent king arriving on the scene, but as an ordinary baby pushed into the world amid Mary’s searing pain. No cradles, soft and warm, but a utilitarian feeding trough surrounded by the ordinary sounds and smells of life (Luke 2:1-20). At the same time, the sky lit up with a multitude of angels (Luke 2:8-20) singing the most beautiful Christmas song announcing the birth of The Savior of the World! What a contrast between the broken and sublime. Hardship and beauty. Both realities coexisted. That realization brings me peace.

JOY COEXISTING WITH SORROW

As I walked into work that day, I felt joyful despite the paddles of life sending me back and forth between happiness and sorrow. You see, true joy can coexist with sorrow because it is not dependent on things always being “good”. Real joy sustained by hope and the deep settled confidence that God is in control of every detail of life. Whether you find yourself reveling or longing, Christmas really is a wonderful time of the year. It’s when we remember that the Lord came. And because He came and conquered sin and death (I Cor. 15:55-57), He will come again. I invite you to experience His joy to the world!

Click to discover how to grab unto God’s joy.

Stay Connected: Lessons from a Leaf

It is a hectic season. Responsibilities with work, family and church overflow my days. Unloading my work tote, I discovered a leaf lying on the bottom of the bag.  I grab it impatiently, but on my short journey to the trash I can notice its beauty. Something makes me stop to look more closely at the leaf. It is deep burnt orange and bright crimson swirled together, so incredibly rich, like a sunset in my hand.  The crisp, jagged outline and stem, so perfectly crafted by the Creator, yet no longer connected to its source of sustenance.

BE STILL!

I realize God placed the leaf in my bag to draw my attention to Him in the middle of my hectic life.  The Creator and Sustainer of the Universe intentionally reaches out to me with an invitation to connect with Him. So, I pause and decide to accept His invitation. I am seen, loved, cared for by my Beloved. He asks me to linger. It is wonderful to be fully in His presence. In those moments, the words from Psalm 46:10 sink deeply into my soul: “Be still and know (recognize, understand) that I am God” comes alive in me. I carefully place the leaf aside, as pause for heart-to-heart connection with God. 

THE DISCONNECTED LEAF

Days later, I picked the leaf up again, but the leaf in no way resembles its previous beauty. It is an ugly blotched brown, dry, shriveled and crumbling. No longer is it connected to its source of life.

Oh Lord Jesus, is this what you mean when you tell us to stay connected to You, The Vine?  When I take time to connect with You, my spirit is alive, vibrant, and beautiful.  But when I discard time with You and focus only on the cares of this world, my spirit quickly becomes dry, brown, and crumbled. I do not resemble the creation You intended me to be and cannot do the things You created me to do. “I am the Vine; you are the branches. The one who remains in Me and I in him bears much fruit, for [otherwise] apart from Me [that is, cut off from vital union with Me] you can do nothing” (John 15:5).

Jesus, in this season when we prepare to celebrate Your coming to earth, draw us to You every moment. Help us keep our eyes and heart fixed on You, not on the distractions swirling around us. Constantly remind us to intentionally connect with You.

GOD DOES NOT FOLLOW MY PLANS

God did not follow my plans for Thanksgiving. God also has not apologized.

God did not follow my plans for Thanksgiving. I anticipated a lovely meal with our adult children with lots of laughter. The phrase “the plans of mice and men oft go awry” comes from the 1785 poem “To a Mouse” by the Scottish poet Robert Burns. It means that even the most carefully made plans can go wrong. In the poem, Burns apologizes to a mouse whose nest he accidentally destroyed while plowing a field. God did not follow my plans. God also has not apologized.

THE DRIVE TO THE ER

We noticed in the weeks before Thanksgiving that Bill’s asthma worsened. We called the doctor for the usual prescription of prednisone. However, God planned differently. It was Tuesday of T-day week, and the medical office requested that Bill come in for an in-person visit. The nurse checked his vitals. Bill’s blood pressure was alarmingly high. The doctor told him immediately to go to the ER. This didn’t fit our plans for the week. Bill argued with the doctor. The doctor won the discussion. I drove Bill to the ER.

NO HALLMARK MOVIE

The ER staff saw him stat and what we thought was asthma proved to be fluid accumulating around the heart and lungs. Again, not our plan. After all, this was Thanksgiving week! Admission to the hospital followed. More tests and bloodwork. We soon learned that one of Bill’s kidneys decided to take a timeout. As the week stretched out, Bill thought he would return home for our picture-perfect Thanksgiving (like in the Hallmark movies). That plan also short circuited. The days crawled by, and the blood pressure remained in the stratosphere. Why didn’t God follow our plans? Didn’t He hear our prayers? Doesn’t God follow the script of Hallmark movies?

GOD’S ANSWERS TO OUR PRAYERS

Yes, God did hear our prayers, but the answers arrived in ways we never anticipated. We always pray that God will daily use us for His glory. God answered as Bill befriended hospital staff and Christ naturally fit into conversations. Bill talked with people he never would have naturally met in our normal plans.

We daily pray for strength, courage to follow Christ, and that God would look out for us. Our plan was an easy prescription of prednisone. God’s plan was someone looking further into Bill’s health and discovering a walking time bomb. God looked out for Bill even when we didn’t know the situation was critical.

Due to my vision difficulties, my plan is to avoid night driving at all costs. God’s plan was for me to drive home from the hospital late that first pitch-black night in pouring down rain. Talk about the song “Jesus Take the Wheel”! God settled my nerves, directed my route, and I only ran against one curb. God’s plan is best when I totally depend on Him.

UNEXPECTED GIFTS

On the 8th day of his hospital stay, Bill was finally disconnected from the IV and released. Given a large bag of new meds, volumes of instructions, and a schedule for further testing and specialist visits, we gratefully made our exit. It is the season of giving. We didn’t anticipate these gifts.

Other than our ultimate reunion with Jesus, we do not know the details of what God has planned in the coming days. We do know the quality of God’s plans, and they are always perfect, filled with His lovingkindness and tender mercy.

“Bless and affectionately praise the Lord, O my soul, and all that is [deep] within me, bless His holy name. Bless and affectionately praise the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget any of His benefits… Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you [lavishly] with lovingkindness and tender mercy; Who satisfies your years with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the [soaring] eagle” (Psalm 103:1-5)

I plan to keep on blessing and praising God, even in the darkest night.

PEACE THAT LASTS

Can you imagine the noise and confusion greeting Mary and Joseph? No peace to be found there.

Silent night, holy night. All is calm, all is bright. …… sleep in heavenly peace. I love You Lord, I worship You. Hope which was lost now stands renewed; I give my life to honor this, the love of Christ the Savior King

BETHLEHEM’S CHAOS

Bethlehem was a loud chaotic mess that night. The Roman emperor, Augustus, demanded a census be taken throughout the Empire so all would register for a tax.  Under Roman law, thousands of people were ordered by the government to travel to their ancestral cities. Augustus forced a highly resentful captive people to travel in harsh conditions in order to hand over their hard-earned cash. Hope departed long ago for any lasting peace.

NO PEACE TO BE FOUND

When Mary and Joseph arrived at Bethlehem, they found a town not equipped to handle a huge influx of visitors. Both food and lodging were scare. Can you imagine the noise and confusion greeting these travelers? No peace to be found here.

A very pregnant Mary and Joseph finally lodged in a cave in the company of animals. No quiet birthing suite to be had. At the baby’s first cry, a giant chorus of angels began singing, inviting an influx of shepherds and sheep to the mix at the stable. So, “silent night” as we would normally picture, did not apply here.

CREATION NOW HAD A FUTURE

However, if one understands “silent night, holy night” as the Creator coming to the forefront, it is a whole different matter. God thwarts Satan before the face of all the universe by the birth of King Jesus in the manger. The Creator gives notice to the Evil One. God expresses His holiness in a tiny baby. Creation now owns a future.

WHY WE CAN SING

That’s why we can sing, quieting all our worries, troubles, tears, and woes. “I love You Lord, I worship You. Hope lost, now stands renewed.” God laid the way to permanently break the barrier of sin which separates us from a holy God. “Since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ” (Romans 5:1). The only honorable response from us can be: “I give my life to honor this, the (absolute) love of Christ the Savior King.”

HOPE LOST, NOW STANDS RENEWED

Peace with God; finally achieved. That is the calmness, the brightness and significance of this night. Chaotic Bethlehem births the major step toward eternal peace with God. Hallelujah! “Hope which lost, now stands renewed.”

Click to read more about the peace God gives