Category: SPIRITUAL GROWTH

MINIMALIST LIVING

Over 200 items have either left my home. This led me to reflect on behaviors in my life, what I cling to, “just in case.”

Oh yes, I am doing the Minimalist 30 Day Purge with a friend. I got rid of one thing on the first day of the month. Two things on August 2nd. Three things on August 3rd. So forth and so on. The rules are explained: “Anything goes! Collectables, decorations, kitchenware, electronics, furniture, bedding, clothes, towels, tools. Whether you donate, sell, or trash your excess, every material possession must be out of your house—and out of your life—by midnight each day.

THE CHALLENGE OF “THE PURGE”

“It’s an easy game at first. Anyone can purge a few items, right? But it grows considerably more challenging by week two, when you’re forced to jettison more than a dozen items per day. And it keeps getting more difficult as the month progresses.” (Look up the Minimalists for further instructions)

Today I drove to the drop-off at the local Reuzit Shop and the volunteer who was handling donations looked at me with horror when I explained my plan. Not sure if the horror was from him having to take continued donations from me or horror if he ever had to do it in his own life.

OVER 200 ITEMS HAVE LEFT THE HOUSE

I’m now on day 17. Okay, I’m an over-achiever, had some extra time, and now have worked ahead to day 21. So that means that over 200 items have either left my home or are waiting to make an exit. Some items have been small, such as the pens that no longer work, but then some have been larger, as in that lawn chair which has gathered dust in the storage locker.

WHAT I CLING TO “JUST IN CASE”

It’s amazing when given a great challenge, one can let go of items. I guess I needed a good excuse. This led me to reflect on behaviors in my life. The things I have clung to, “just in case.” Under the excuse of wanting to defend myself, I have clung to anger. Under the premise of desiring to have the last word, I have clung to sarcasm. God wants to empower me to purge the way I do life.

LETTING GO OF BEHAVIORS

In the words of the Apostle Paul: “You learned Christ! My assumption is that you have paid careful attention to him, been well instructed in the truth precisely as we have it in Jesus. Since, then, we do not have the excuse of ignorance, everything—and I do mean everything—connected with that old way of life has to go. It’s rotten through and through. Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life—a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you.

THE TRUCKLOAD OF “DON’TS”

“What this adds up to, then, is this: no more lies, no more pretense. Tell your neighbor the truth. In Christ’s body we’re all connected to each other, after all. When you lie to others, you end up lying to yourself. Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life. Did you use to make ends meet by stealing? Well, no more! Get an honest job so that you can help others who can’t work.

DON’T BREAK GOD’S HEART

Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift. Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted. Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:20-32)

EACH WORD IS A GIFT

Hmm…. I think God is telling me to get rid of much more than physical items in my home. I can not do this on my own strength. My new mantra has to be “Say only what helps, each word a gift. Don’t grieve God. Don’t break his heart. His Holy Spirit, moving and breathing in you, is the most intimate part of your life, making you fit for himself. Don’t take such a gift for granted.” Amen!

And now for Day 22…..

WHAT DOES UNITY REALLY MEAN?

Have you ever been through a church break-up? Resentment and unforgiveness ruled supreme and you couldn’t even seem to sense Jesus’ presence anymore. And the pain was overwhelming.

“Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity!” Ahh! Easier said than done. (Psalm 133:1-3)

“Have you ever been through a church break-up? For years you met together on Sundays, wore out each other’s carpet, cooked meals for those who were sick, told one another how much you loved each other and how much Jesus loves us.  And then you found you disagreed on something vital, and everything started to crumble. Suddenly, arguments became the order of the day. Finally the congregation split in two. Those you considered your best friends didn’t want to speak to you anymore.  Resentment and unforgiveness ruled supreme and you couldn’t even seem to sense Jesus’ presence anymore. And the pain was overwhelming.” (quoted from “In Defense of the Gospel”)

WHAT IS THE CHURCH?

What is the church? A club? An organization dedicated to a particular interest or activity? My father faithfully attended both the Lions Club and church. As a child, I did not see much difference between the two. Thankfully, Jesus knows the difference. Jesus considers His Body, the church, so significant that one of His final prayers is for the future church: “I am praying not only for these disciples but also for all who will ever believe in me through their message. I pray that they will all be one, just as you and I are one—as you are in me, Father, and I am in you. And may they be in us so that the world will believe you sent me.” (John 17:20-21) How the Lions Club interacted within itself did not make anyone believe God had sent Christ. It was just a club. Church, as designed by Christ, is to be marked by unity.

CHURCH IS NOT A CLUB

Christ’s concept of unity is a miracle, utterly unique from anything offered by our world. Without the magnificent work of the Holy Spirit actively empowering how believers interact with other believers, we miss the target by a mile. We become only an organization, a club.

IN UNITY, DISAGREEMENT IS POSSIBLE

In biblical unity, believers can disagree. Remember the sharp disagreement between Barnabas and Paul over the issue of John Mark recorded in Acts 15:36-39? John Mark previously deserted Paul and Barnabas on a missionary trip.  Barnabas wants to give the young man a second chance. Barnabas and Paul come to a compromise: Barnabas leaves on a missions trip with John Mark and Paul departs on his journey accompanied by Silas. The plus is that they ended up making two productive trips instead of the sole one previously planned. Furthermore, notice Paul’s attitude. He continues to praise Barnabas (I Cor. 9:3-6) and at the end of his life, Paul thinks so highly of John Mark that he requests a visit from him (II Tim. 4:11).  Barnabas and Paul disagreed, but they never slammed the door on their relationship. They maintained unity even though they had disagreed.

LIVING IN UNITY LEAVES A MARK ON THE WORLD

To live in unity with believers matters to Christ! Tristan Wax observes, “In the end, the goal isn’t papering over differences and finding surface-level agreement. Church unity matters because (1) our unity is connected to the unity of God himself (and thus our disunity is a scandalous affront to the gospel), (2) the world sees a reflection of God’s inner life in our fellowship when we participate in his divine love, and (3) it’s the means by which we withstand the pressures of the world that rage against God’s truth.”

Does your unity with fellow believers mirror God’s glory or do you just consider church a club? Are you ready to obey and to “withstand the pressures of the world that rage against God’s truth”? With the power and guidance of the Holy Spirit, living in unity with believers is our deepest reflection of God’s glory.

Click to read further: Christian Unity Is Deeper than ‘Getting Along’

TRANSFORMED FROM MARTHA TO MARY

All through the Martha years, I go to church, pray often, meet with a small group to discuss Christian values, and even teach Sunday school. I’m so tired.

Until five years ago, picture me a modern day “Martha”. I busy myself in the kitchen distracted by preparations; always cleaning, preparing, cooking, and organizing. My do-it-all mentality gets on my husband’s nerves as I tend to the needs of our three children. I begin my day by looking at the calendar, making a to-do-list, starting two loads of laundry, cleaning the bathroom, and unloading the dishwasher all before breakfast. All through the Martha years, I go to church, pray often, meet with a small group to discuss Christian values, and even teach Sunday school.

I PUSHED THAT VOICE ASIDE

Yet, I didn’t fully grasp the one thing that was necessary.  I heard a faint voice saying, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered and anxious about so many things; but only one thing is necessary.”  I pushed that voice aside for many years until one day I chose to listen.

BUSY MARTHA

Are you also a “Martha”? In the Bible, Martha busies herself cooking a meal for her guests, including Jesus. During the preparations, she becomes upset because her sister Mary should be helping her. Instead, sister Mary sits at the feet of Jesus, listening and learning from Him.

Martha harbors resentment and goes to Jesus. “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.” Jesus replies to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:38-42).

THE INVITATION TO COMPANIONSHIP

Jesus’ openly invites not only to Martha, but all of us. He asks us to worship first before we work. Joanna Weaver, author of “Having A Mary Heart in a Martha World” states, “In obedience to his invitation, we find the key to our longings, the secret to living beyond the daily pressures that would otherwise tear us apart. For as we learn what it means to choose the Better Part of intimacy with Christ, we begin to be changed.”

Weaver explains that our world may celebrate our accomplishments, but our God desires our companionship. Martha’s hurriedness in the kitchen made her lose sight of the intimacy of the living room. Opening her home did not mean she opened her heart. We do not need to prove our love to Jesus. When we serve Jesus, don’t miss the opportunity to know Jesus and how much he loves us. 

MY SURRENDER

Then, my son Ryan was diagnosed with leukemia. At that point, five years ago, I completely understood the magnitude of what I was missing in my life.  In August 2019, I fully surrendered myself to God and my new name became “Mary”. Mary, the sister of Martha, who worshipped at the feet of Jesus and humbly learned what is most important in life.

The morning before Ryan died, I watched my son’s chest rise and fall with labored breathing. His head had not left his pillow for days as his depleted energy made any movement difficult. My Mary heart waited for Jesus to come and take the suffering away for my dear son.  At that moment, I witnessed the transforming power of God as Ryan sat straight up in bed with a force not of this world. His hands stretched outright ready to greet his heavenly Father. The gasp heard from his voice made me think that he was seeing the glory that was to be his shortly.

My itinerary for my life ahead is not mine to decide. I seek to humbly and sacrificially serve instead of allowing my achievements and to-do-list to take priority. By giving my life to God and submitting to His plan, my worries are cast aside. 1 Peter 5:7 states, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”  Do you also need to be renamed “Mary”?

LOVING ENOUGH TO CONFRONT

His behavior affects the entire local church, yet they cower in fear.

The scandal of the century, Watergate, happened in 1972. Daniel Silliman writes in his book “One Lost Soul: Richard Nixon’s Search for Salvation”: “President Nixon tried to hide it—blaming it on underlings, protesting he knew nothing about it—but the cover-up started to unravel. Pastor John Huffman was a personal friend of Nixon and worried about him. He said Nixon wasn’t handling things in a biblical way. ‘You need to confess,’ Pastor John Huffman told Nixon. ‘You need to be honest with the American people.’

THE MESSAGE OF NATHAN

“Pastor Huffman preached a difficult sermon with Nixon in attendance using the text of Acts 26:26: ‘The king is familiar with these things, and I can speak freely to him. I am convinced that none of this has escaped his notice, because it was not done in a corner.’ The message was clear. The cover-up was immoral. Huffman didn’t add the words of Nathan the prophet, but he might as well have said to the president, ‘You are the man!’

THE FAITHFUL FRIEND

“That sermon hit Nixon. It sent him into retreat. In that isolation, ultimately, his presidency ended. Huffman’s choice to speak up seems to be a moment of moral courage. Huffman recalls it differently. All these years later, he remembers how he felt about Nixon and how he saw in himself the same weaknesses as Nixon, the same susceptibility to sin. He remembers he said the thing he would have wanted someone to say to him as a faithful friend. “I really loved the man,”

THE DIFFERENCE

“It makes me think of all the other ministers who didn’t challenge Nixon when they knew he was like a lost sheep, gone astray. I think of all the other powerful leaders caught up in scandal, from King David to modern day leaders and the ministers around them hoping to catch a little reflection off the light of their celebrity. What made Huffman different? I think it was love.”

THE CHURCH THAT LACKS COURAGE

The church of addressed in the book of III John ignores the truth regarding one of their leaders. They have in their midst a man by the name of Diotrephes. “Diotrephes, who loves to be the leader, refuses to have anything to do with us….and the evil accusations he is making against us. Not only does he refuse to welcome the traveling teachers, he also tells others not to help them. And when they do help, he puts them out of the church.” Diotrephes loves being in power and refuses to listen to clear teachings regarding visiting Bible teachers. He boots out anyone who disagrees with him. His soul isn’t “prospering” (verse 3) and wilts on the vine. The danger is that soul sickness like this is contagious. The entire community of believers suffers. They lacked courage.

Diotrephes needs to be confronted face to face by his fellow believers. He appears healthy on the outside, but his interior spiritual health is desperately ill.  The man bursts with pride, envy, slander, and disobedience. His behavior affects the entire local church. They cower in fear.

LOVE ENOUGH TO CONFRONT

The Apostle John gently writes: Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but [imitate] what is good. The one who practices good [exhibiting godly character, moral courage and personal integrity] is of God; the one who practices [or permits or tolerates] evil has not seen God [he has no personal experience with Him and does not know Him at all]. Basically, John says even though Diotrephes puts on a big show, he does not know God. The local church needs to deal with it, even though this can get messy. They need to love Diotrephes enough to confront him.

Do you know a Diotrephes in your circle of believers? Have you taken the time in prayer and in the Word to lovingly deal with him/her? A soul is at stake and possibly the souls of many others. God can give you same courage He gave to Pastor John Huffman. Love enough to confront.

For further reading on confronting someone regarding sin, click to read Galatians 6

Click to read the article “He Told Nixon to Confess”

THE ABSENCE OF SHORT CUTS

The long way is often better

My husband and I have 2 divergent styles of driving the car.  He likes to meander off the beaten path and enjoy the scenery. For him, “short-cut” means “long-cut.”  My approach to driving is navigating as efficiently and fast as possible. It is a running joke in our household that the fastest route is always with Mom at the wheel.

THE “LONG-CUTS”

Too bad that my style of navigation isn’t God’s style.  God’s life map often includes the “long-cuts.” He does not consult my plans entailing a delightful marriage to a minister with an adoring congregation. Included in the picture is motherhood to at least four loving children and an eventual abundance of grandchildren. Our real estate is a unique beautiful brick house. Along the way, I was to develop as a well-respected teacher. Yep, that was my life map. Well, I got the first plan right:  marriage to a minister.

OUR DETOURS

The off-road detours were not part of my plan:  losing loved friends to terminal diseases, upending our lives and moving 14 times in our marriage, coping with years of strain of unemployment and financial stress, not having any daughters to go shopping with, and saying goodbye to career dreams.  The detour list goes on and on. God does not often match His GPS with mine.

THOSE WHO POINT TO JESUS

We sometimes feel like lost travelers who long for the route in which everything makes sense. Intermittently we find solace in fellow travelers who have navigated the same backroads; those who have not cursed God in the process. The blessings are the travelers who share the pain and point to Jesus.

THOSE SEASONS OF LIGHT

And yet, there are those seasons of light. The times when I had the privilege of directing children’s performances and realized that without God, none of this astoundingly joyous moment would have been possible. The occasions when I share the bottomless truth of God’s Word with a friend and finally see the “aha!” light blink in their eyes. God rides to the rescue in ways I never imagine. Indeed, God shines His light, but seldom when I claim the sole right to turn on the light.

NOT THE NAVIGATOR

I am not the navigator in the pilot seat, but part of the obedient crew in the back of the plane. I am the adventurer of Hebrews 11 who identifies with Abraham, who “was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.” God calls us to be explorers who look and long “for a better country – a heavenly one.” 

God may direct my path through the mud, the weeds or choose the well-maintained highway, but point A rarely goes directly and easily to point B. All He asks is that I obediently stay on His path and look at the delightful scenery He places along the way. Lord, help us to trust, even in the “long-cuts.”

Click and listen to the story of Andy & Jamie Stewart

TOO MANY IRONS IN THE FIRE

I had thought that no matter what I could process a way through my greatest challenges

Growing up, my father constantly worked. He was a child of the Great Depression. His repeated mantra for his busyness was, “I have too many irons in the fire.” There is a strong genetic link to his youngest daughter: me.

THE IRONS WERE MULTIPLYING

My week has been a doozy. Currently, I’m in the process of learning the ropes at a new employer. After leaving work Monday I received a message from my doctor’s office to go straight to the ER for tests to determine if I was experiencing a new pulmonary embolism. After 6 hours at the ER, all the testing was negative, but I still had no answers. My mind was thrown off track. The irons were multiplying in the fire of my heart and mind.

MY WORST NIGHTMARE

Three days later, Thursday afternoon, I woke up from a power nap. It was 6 PM. I checked my calendar and realized I was supposed to be leading the Writers Group at 6:30PM at GCC. For years, my recurring nightmare is discovering I’m scheduled for a major commitment, and I am not prepared in the slightest. In the nightmare, I cannot even locate where the event is to be.

I couldn’t think straight as I raced to GCC. My dream became reality, especially when I arrived at church and found out that our scheduled room was occupied by another group. Where were we to meet?

The entirety of the events of the week occupied major space in my heart. I couldn’t think straight. I’m glad I didn’t drive past a metal detector. I had so many “irons in the fire” that the metal alarms would have been shrieking.

GUARD YOUR HEART

The Apostle John speaks to this: Little children (believers, dear ones), guard yourselves from idols—[false teachings, moral compromises, and anything that would take God’s place in your heart]. (I John 5:21 AMP) My paraphrase is: “Dear believers, guard your hearts so that all those ‘irons in the fire’ do not occupy (and explode into shrapnel) your heart and take the place of God.”

THE IDOL OF SELF-DETERMINATION

God humbled me. My computer presentation for the class did not exist, my energy level was depleted, and my mental acuity was zero. I thought I had everything under control until God showed me it was just the idol of self-determination.

Maybe some of you have run into the same idol: thinking that no matter what, you can process a way through the greatest challenges. The Holy Spirit prompted me to throw the idol of self-determination out the car window. The wording of my prayer changed between home and GCC. I had been pleading, “Lord, I am so embarrassed, please don’t have anyone show up for class.” I now prayed “Lord, do whatever You want with whatever You have planned for this evening.”

GOD THREW OUT MY “IRONS”

And that’s exactly what He did. Just one person came, and it was totally God’s event. The conversation I had with one lone writer was an answer to previous prayers regarding growing a friendship with that particular participant. Self-determination certainly did not answer that prayer. It was God. He threw out my “irons”.

So, what are the irons in the fire that are occupying your heart and mind? John says, “Little children (believers, dear ones), guard yourselves from idols—[false teachings, moral compromises, and anything that would take God’s place in your heart].” In light of eternity, the schedules, anxieties, and responsibilities of this life are just a flicker. Don’t allow anything to take God’s place in your heart. Let go of the irons.

Click here for more on being too busy for God.

THIRSTY NO MORE

Are you thirsty for change?

It was Sarah’s last leg of her bike trip, on her hottest and thirstiest day. With family she bicycled from Pittsburgh to Washington, DC during a heat wave. At times her “vacation” felt like a trip through hades. Thirsty didn’t even begin to describe how she felt.

THE THIRSTY WOMAN

Have you ever wondered about that other thirsty person? The “woman at the well” described in John 4? We don’t even know her real name. A social outcast, she was not going for the prize of reaching Washington, DC. There was no air-conditioning and comfort for her to look forward to. No, every day this woman at the ostracized by her village; only allowed to obtain her water at the hottest time of the day. Exhausted, tired, and exasperated, she sees a man (Jesus) sitting at the well. He has the temerity to ask for some of her water. Then he has the nerve to bring up religion (remember, He was a Jew, and she was a Samaritan). Jesus even says she is missing something.

WATER THAT LIVES

What is she missing? Living water (not the kind sitting in the pot on top of her head). What is “Living Water”? In John 7, Jesus says, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” John further explains, “by this he meant the Spirit.”

KINGDOM PERSONALITY

Are these rivers flowing from you? Is the Holy Spirit bubbling over in your life? This is not self-generated. How does one obtain what is termed “A Kingdom Personality,” a personality fully powered by the Holy Spirit?

NO EXCUSES

To begin with, we don’t make excuses. Dallas Willard writes in “Renovation of the Heart“: We often say, “Nobody’s perfect.” We don’t say this just when someone fails but also when we run up against the Bible’s description of the kingdom personality of “genuine mutual love” that is free of “all malice, and all guile, insincerity, envy, and all slander.” We rush to say it because we feel inadequate compared to such love. But what if we don’t make that description about us—focusing on our shortcomings—but instead linger on the beauty of God and God’s kingdom?

THE RADICAL PERSON

Try picturing this hypothetical moment of dwelling on the beauty of God and the kingdom life: Let’s say I confessed to you my disgust with someone who annoyed me and how hopeless I felt about ever loving this person. What if instead of trying to make me feel better by saying, “Nobody’s perfect,” you said you believed in God’s power to transform me into a radical person who pays loving attention to those who annoy me? Will you pray for me about this? What if later that day you encountered an annoying person and, without thinking, treated that person with kindness and attentiveness—partly because of the transforming effect of our conversation about the kingdom personality?

DEPENDING ON THE HOLY SPIRIT

Do you ask others to pray for you to be transformed into a radical believer, depending totally on the transforming power of the Living Water, the Holy Spirit? How about we begin praying for each other the goldmine prayer of Ephesians: And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! (Ephesians 3: 17-21) This is a prayer that can bring immeasurable results. Living Water never runs out.

Click for more info on “Living Water”

HOW TO GET UNSTUCK

Have you ever noticed in the Gospels that Jesus didn’t waste His time going around screaming at the Roman soldiers?

Just how did we drive the car over the parking curb?  The vehicle was wedged in so tightly that we could not clear the barrier. Yes, I confess I was the driver on that little side trip in Florida. We made a wrong turn. I chose to stop at a tiny parking lot next to the shore so we could get our bearings. Concentrating more on the map than parking the car, I pulled in too far and drove right over the curb. Stuck good and tight. Repeatedly, I tried alternately putting the car into drive and reverse, but made no headway. 

THE SEASONS OF NO HEADWAY

There are seasons of my life in which I have become stuck, unable to make headway. The fruits of the Spirit are meant to propel me forward: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. However, my fruit withers on the vine.  Because of my rotten judgment, I become stuck, wedged on a spiritual curb.

TOSS OUT THE TRASH

This is not God’s ideal plan for believers. There is an antidote for getting stuck: tossing in the trash the excess weight of sin.  For example, one can’t be faithful to God (a fruit of the Spirit) and also sexually immoral at the same time. It is impossible to continue in impurity and indecent behavior if self-control and goodness are the filters for our minds.  Idolatry and witchcraft go down the tubes if one first loves God above all else.  Hostilities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, and selfish ambition are not even on the table if love, patience, kindness, and self-control are our first response to pain.  I can’t sustain a fit of rage if the Holy Spirit is controlling the words that come out of my mouth.

WHAT DOES THE SPIRIT LIFE LOOK LIKE

What does a Spirit controlled life look like? Have you ever noticed in the Gospels that Jesus didn’t waste His time going around screaming at the Roman soldiers?  Christ didn’t throw that first stone at the woman caught in adultery. Never did He move away from the dinner table when the tax collectors sat next to Him. He even loved His disciples when they were at odds with each other over who would be first in the Kingdom of God.  Jesus lived in an unlovable world.  The words that come out of His mouth and His behaviors are all fruits of the Spirit. Every single last one…

TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF THE WHEEL

Is it possible for believers to live this way? What exactly are the good fruits? Galatians 5:22-23:But the fruit of the Spirit [the result of His presence within us] is love [unselfish concern for others], joy, [inner] peace, patience [not the ability to wait, but how we act while waiting], kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. (Amplified Version) How do we live such a way? By the empowerment of the Holy Spirit.  Choosing to take our hands off our spiritual steering wheels. 

Has your spiritual life gotten stuck? Maybe you don’t know how you ended up there, but you desperately need the power of the Holy Spirit to lift you out of that pit of deed of the flesh.  What’s the solution? Confess it, turn away from it, and ask the Holy Spirit for directions on how to live.  Since I have a God who got a rental car eventually unstuck from a parking curb in Florida, I know that we have a God Who can steer us safely into living holy lives.

Click here to listen to the life transformation of Cortney Bruketta

MY LIFE AS A PRISONER

God sent us into the wilderness to get to know Him better.

Are you a multi-tasker? I ended up multi-tasking to the extreme. At one point, work included: being a music teacher grades K-12; privately coaching vocal students; directing a 30 voice children’s choir at church; directing a 70-voice regional choir; leading the musical programs at Christian camps; teaching a weekly women’s Sunday School Class. I even ran a class so that women could better manage their health (what a joke!). On the side, I was making and selling jewelry at craft shows and teaching others how to make jewelry. If it could be done, I did it. What a prison I was living in.

OVERWORKED AND UNHAPPY

Did I mention I also loved burning leaves? Maybe burning leaves was significant because I felt my life was going up in smoke. I was overworked and unhappy. When oh when would the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow come into sight?

In the background was my family: husband and two sons. My husband was a pastor; dedicated to his calling. My sons were excellent kids, but did I really know any of them? Had I taken a second to breathe?

THE YEARS OF DISSEMBLING

Then came the years of dissembling. Signs of an approaching storm already appeared on the horizon, but I ignored it. Surely, nothing that bad could ever come about for someone who loved Jesus. Right? Wrong! God ripped all of those commitments and ministries right out of our hands. In a twinkling of an eye, we were without a church home, a regular schedule, and a stable home base. Savings quickly evaporated. I obsessed about finding my husband a new job. He had sunk into deep depression, so I spent hours searching job boards and writing resumes and sending letters to countless churches on his behalf. Nothing worked.

WALLS BEGINNING TO FALL

Workaholic Jacqui was at the end of her rope. The bottom had arrived. Suddenly, there were hours, days and weeks to think….Were the prison walls beginning to fall?

Not until the end has been reached does one realize that maybe they are on the wrong path. Not until I gave up my puny efforts could God rebuild new lives. Only He could make the huge internal change in not only how we see Him, but how we see ourselves and our relationship to ministry.

THE BEST PRISON CHAPLAIN

Instead of viewing God as a job, a commitment, and a career, God became Father and Provider. He pried our hands off of possessions, aspirations for ministry, and plans for the future. God no longer was Someone researched in order to prepare a lesson. He is that Friend Who takes His time for visits that can be quite lengthy. He is the best prison chaplain!

MINISTRY TODAY

What is our relationship to church and ministry today? Church is a community of believers that deeply care about each other. Technically we belong to a large local church, but in our hearts, real church plays out in small pockets: the women’s “Tribe” I am part of, the men Bill mentors, the writing friends God has blessed me with, and the assortment of Christian friends we call family.

TOOLS, NOT “PROJECT MANAGERS”

We no longer consider “ministry” something we possess. Ministry is something God can steer us into for a season and then steer us out of another season. We don’t have a strangle hold on to what is God’s and not ours. He does with ministry and programs what He wants and He prospers what He wants to prosper. We are His tools, not His project managers.

Today, both Bill and I are investors. We invest in the lives of other believers or individuals on the cusp of believing.  We take seriously the prayer, time and effort needed to pour into the lives of God’s children. Sometimes this is well received. Other times, it can be painful. However, this is the passion God has led us to. It just took that long painful journey into the wilderness to get us here.

PRISONERS CAN BE SET FREE

Are you going through a similar long painful journey? From firsthand experience, I can tell you that the pain is worth it if you let God do the rebuilding. God never wants His children to be their own “project managers”. God sent us into the wilderness to get to know Him better. Into the barrens the we went. The prisoners can be set free!

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. (Isaiah 61:1-3)

Click here to hear Jeff Parker’s testimony of being set free

LOVE THAT NEVER RUNS

I would rather have a root canal than knowingly sit next to the brother/sister who has hurt me.

And there we sat side by side at the picnic. It was difficult. My sister in Christ hated my guts at that moment. I just wanted to exit stage left as fast as possible.

BEING A “RUNNER”

I am a “runner”. There, I said it. I am that person who will separate as quickly as possible when there is conflict with another brother or sister in Christ. Give me the person who has deeply wounded me and 100% of the time I emotionally jump out the window when I pass by them again. Frankly, I would rather have a root canal than knowingly sit next to the brother/sister who has hurt me.

WE HAVE ALL BEEN DEEPLY HURT

The sad fact is that no one in this world hasn’t been deeply injured in his/her relationships to others. This is especially true in the church. That’s why I John 4:7-21 is so challenging:  “If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates (works against) his [Christian] brother he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen.  And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should also [unselfishly] love his brother and seek the best for him.“

THE MERE ABSENCE OF LOVE IS DEADLY

How does a habit of withdrawal effect one’s spiritual life? Dallas Willard comments in “Renovation of the Heart”: Failure to love others as Jesus loves us chokes off the flow of the eternal kind of life that our whole human system cries out for. The old apostle minced no words: “He who does not love abides in death” (verse 14). Notice that he did not say, “He who hates,” but simply, “He who does not love.” The mere absence of love is deadly. It is withdrawal.”

COURAGEOUS LOVE

Is it possible to have this type of courageous love – the type is determined by the grace of God to stick around, rather than flee? Non-courageous love means that I do not extend love toward that difficult brother/sister because of my past issues. I am not letting issues control my feelings. On the contrary, I make a choice to extend love because I allow Jesus to revolutionize my character, my inner being.

JESUS NEVER RAN

This is a change by submission: allowing God to change me from the inside out through my relationship with God. Instead of putting on my running shoes when conflict arises, I allow the character of Christ enter my life. Jesus never ran.

Are you also a “runner”? I remember a congregation where one family was in conflict with another. They always attended the same service, but made sure they sat on opposite sides of the sanctuary. Their spiritual running shoes were always in service. “The mere absence of love is deadly. It is withdrawal.” Jesus love never runs.

Click for more information on how to love well.