Category: anger

MELTDOWN AT THE CHICK-FIL-A

In front of the store with friendly people, I was angrily berating my husband for not having any alternative plan.

If my watch pedometer is correct, that Saturday I walked 7.5 miles in New York City. No, I was not training for a marathon (unless there is a marathon for stupidity). The bus dropped us passengers off for three hours of free time before seeing a Broadway Show. Our group quickly scattered in different directions. The fly in the ointment is that my husband and I had made no plans for where we would spend our free time.

LOOPING AROUND THE TWIGHT LIGHT ZONE

And so, we found ourselves exhausted from wandering in what seemed like a Twight Zone episode, as we looped repeatedly around the area near Rockefeller Center. It may have also been a scene from the movie Ground Hog Day. I am not particularly good at following Google Directions when it is in walking mode. The constant stepping wreaked havoc on the inflammation I have in my back. My fuse became shorter and shorter as my husband offered well intended suggestions. Do you know in downtown New York City it is rare to discover places to sit down, unless you are paying a fortune for a decent restaurant?

IT ALL CAME TO A HEAD AT CHICK-FIL-A

Ironically, it all came to a head in front of a Chick-Fil-A. That is when it dawned on my husband that where he wanted to go (Macy’s) was a good ten blocks further. He had missed my earlier words specifying how far it was. And so, next to the store that stands for great values, I was angrily berating my husband for not hearing my previous explanation and not having any alternative plan.

MY BODY IS FAILING

My body is failing as I age. Recently I had a series of infusions for a back inflammation which does not seem inclined to clear up any time soon. I do not behave well during stress when my pain level is at a ten. As you read this, I am sure you have already picked up on that point.

SLOW TO GET ANGRY???

And what does the Bible say about all this? “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry” (James 1:19). However, I chose to go in the opposite direction. I wanted to sprint towards angry words and remain slow as molasses in listening. No way did I want to place a filter over my mouth.

NOT HURRYING TO OBEY

David’s words of Psalm 119:60 were ignored: “I will hurry, without delay, to obey your commands.” Even though my feet were moving slower and slower due back pain, my spiritual heart ran full tilt against God’s instructions. I wanted my husband to hear me loud and clear, even though God was emphasizing to me that duct tape over my mouth would be a much better behavior plan.

QUICK TO LISTEN…SLOW TO SPEAK

So, the day after, are we still married? Yes. Is my back still screaming? Yes. Do I wish I could take back every word that came out of my mouth in front of Chick-Fil-A? Yes!!!!! Lord, please ingrain in my heart, no matter the circumstances, to “be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.” Also, thank You God for a forgiving husband.

Click to listen to the story of Eric Ludy

THE DILEMA OF SALLY’S LONLINESS

The friend paused and replied, “Sally, right now your voice is raised, and you are jabbing your finger at me. If that isn’t anger, I don’t know what is.”

Sally still can’t figure out what is wrong.  She is not in her prime, single, a believer, and feels friendless. People disappear from her bank of friends right and left. They are there for a season and then drop off the map. Sally keeps asking God, “Why don’t my friends stick around?” Seriously, does God have limited resources?

Today she read in her Bible that God gives wisdom to those who ask for it. Sally ardently asked God for wisdom regarding friendship. However, the following events transpired which did not appear as God’s answer to Sally’s prayers.

UNWELCOME ANSWERS TO HER PRAYERS

She encountered an ex-friend at the grocery store. Sally mustered up the courage to ask why they had grown apart. The woman cautiously looked at her and said, “I just couldn’t put up with your anger anymore.”

Sally immediately declared, “What anger? What are you talking about? I may get a little frustrated, but I don’t get angry!!!!”

The friend paused and replied, “Sally, right now your voice is raised, and you are jabbing your finger at me. If that isn’t anger, I don’t know what is.”

Sally looked down at her hands. They were clenched into fists. Looking down the aisle, Sally could see customers eyeing her with alarm. Was her voice that loud? She hustled out of the store and called another ex-friend. As soon as the second woman answered the phone, Sally blurted out, “Tracey, can you believe it. I saw Nancy at the grocery store. She says I’m an angry person.”

After a long awkward pause, Tracey slowly said, “I’m so sorry Sally, but yes, I agree with Nancy. That’s why our visits are few and far between.  I just can’t take it anymore.” Sally hung up.

SHE ASKED FOR WISDOM, NOT FOR THIS

As the day went by, Sally continued to make additional calls. A few women answered the phone, but many went straight to voicemail. The women she talked to often hemmed and hawed. Some gave the same response as Nancy and Tracey. Sally burst into tears. What was wrong with God? She asked for wisdom, not for this.

Later that evening, Sally sat down in her recliner and looked up the topic of “Christians and Anger” via Gotquestions.org. A flood of verses appeared before her:

THE ANGER VERSES

  • “Refrain from anger and forsake wrath!
  • “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.”
  • “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
  • “Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the heart of fools.”
  • “For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
  • “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.”

Was this the reason for the absence of the deep friendships Sally desired? As Sally prayed, she remembered all her angry encounters with clenched fists. She felt a light breeze blow over the pages of her Bible.

FILLED TO THE MEASURE OF ALL THE FULLNESS OF GOD

Looking down, Sally read the prayer of the Apostle Paul for the believers at Ephesus: And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us (Ephesians 3:17-20) 

At her wits end, Sally knew only by immeasurable power of God could she conquer her anger. She cried as she confessed her sin. God had answered her prayer for wisdom. Can she rely on His resources alone?