Zigzags are normal in walking with God. David endured years of persecution from King Saul while on the journey to David’s divinely appointed inauguration. The Apostle Paul bore the hardship of at least nine plots against his life and spent at least four years as a prisoner. Yet, he is one of the most influential writers of the New Testament. Some of Paul’s most famous letters were written from a jail cell. Were David and Saul out of God’s will because their paths were not easy? No! Walking with God is rarely convenient or simple. Yet, each season of life is to prepare a believer for the next season.
IS THIS WHERE GOD WANTS US?
Years back, we pastored a challenging church. The years progressively became more difficult and painful. Bill’s health suffered due to the stress. Yet we persevered. Often, we came home from church and asked, “Is this where God wants us?” Then we would agree God had not shown us it was time to leave. Looking back, I think God earlier did show us loud and clear, but we didn’t want to pull the trigger. We kept hoping the situation would turn around.
GOD PULLED THE TRIGGER
God suddenly pulled the trigger in a way we never anticipated. The Board came across a retired pastor they could use for free. They informed Bill that he was to announce his resignation to the congregation the following Sunday. And that was the end.
WHERE WAS GOD?
What followed was a season of loss greater than we had ever known. Bill was out of his calling/vocation, our home went into foreclosure during a time of upside-down mortgages, and the loss of friendships and resources was incalculable. Our daily pain was major surgery without anesthesia. I kept slogging away at a full-time job I detested. So confusing! Where was God? It’s more difficult when “religious” people administer a great deal of the pain.
SLOW ROAD TO HEALING
My road to healing progressed at a snail’s pace. During lunch breaks, I would walk in downtown Lancaster and repeatedly whisper, “Lord, I choose to trust in You.” I memorized Psalm 34:17-20, Psalm 10:14, Psalm 40:2, & Psalm 33:6-9. This gradually changed the trajectory of my heart. That journey prepared me for this past November 2025, when Bill began the first of his five hospital stays.
“LORD, I CHOOSE TO TRUST YOU”
During the past months of repeat hospitalizations, my commute to the hospital has often been unnerving because of the number of unknowns. I would not know what the doctors would say that day, what testing would be accomplished, or how awful that day might be for Bill. Yet, I consistently opened my palms to God, saying, “Lord, I choose to trust in You.” This season has often been brutal for both of us.
We are especially grateful right now. The doctors finally think they have arrived at a correct diagnosis and treatment plan. Bill has stayed out of the hospital for a straight seven weeks and is regaining strength. I’m slowly recovering from all those months of exhaustion in trying to take care of Bill.
OUR ZIGZAGS PREPARED US
I thank God for that agonizing season with that church all those years ago. It gave us a firm foundation for these past seven months. Zigzags are normal in walking with God. Often, I think we are zagging more than zigging. Walking with God is rarely convenient or simple. We are blessed that the earlier season prepared us for this current season. How is God preparing you?